A Little of This, A Little of That
by Pokota
Summary: This is a collection of silly ideas that came into my head randomly. I don't know when the next update will be, or what it will contain. Please be aware that unless I specifically refer to an older portion, all of these are unrelated to each other.
1. Paintball, Marriage, Pranking, Love

A/N: This is a collection of silly ideas that came into my head randomly. I don't know when the next update will be, or what it will contain. Please be aware that unless I specifically refer to an older portion, all of these are unrelated outside of the common thread that has to be here.

A/N Continued: Officially, these are all Harry Potter minifics. HOWEVER, many of these will cross over with other things. I will mark at the start which 'verses are blended in these cases. See #4 for an example.

A/N The Last: Ratings may vary by minific.

* * *

MINIFIC 1

Ginny drew her gun, and quietly loaded it with the special ammunition Hary had given her. The rest of her squad was out of commission, and it was too risky to use magic in her state. She smiled inwardly; it was a good thing Harry had taught her how to shoot.

There was a rustle of leaves behind her. She turned around as quickly as she could, and fired once - twice - three times.

Out fell Voldemort, covered in Blue Paint. By the rules of the game, he was dead.

"Ginny~!"

Harry fell out of a nearby tree, covered in Red Paint. "You got Voldemort? Awesome! We won!"

Voldemort stood up and brushed himself off. "Yes, well, I did get you, Potter. I can't believe I had to resort to such a muggle game to finally have 'killed' you."

Harry shrugged. "At least this way we can end the war without spilling any more blood, pure or otherwise. And you did sign a magical contract saying you would honor the end result."

Voldemort flushed. "Only because I thought Snape and the Malfoys would be on my team!" he yelled angrily.

* * *

MINIFIC 2

"What do you mean, an arranged marriage!"

Harry was, once again, in Professor Dumbledore's office. The old warlock only bowed his head shamefully.

"Harry, what you have to understand is that your Mother took 'The Power of Love' a little too literally."

Harry thought about what that could mean for a moment, then vomited.

"That's disgusting."

Dumbledore smiled sadly. "Well, at least she didn't take it that literally. So would you like for me to tell you who she is?"

Harry nodded slowly, bracing himself for the dreadful news that he would have to tell Ginny. Dumbledore did not meet Harry's eyes.

"It is Ginny Weasley."

"Great. Just great. Now I'll have to break up with Ginny to fill... the... wait, who?"

"Ginny Weasley." Dumbledore repeated.

* * *

MINIFIC 3

Remus Lupin was slowly backing away from Dumbledore's office's guard-goyles.

He backed into the Weasley Twins.

"What are you doing here?" asked Lupin.

"We decided to pay Filch a visit." "Seeing as how we owe him for helping us so much." "Why were you backing away from Dumbledore's Office?"

Before anyone could answer, Dumbledore came out of his office. He was blue, and slightly dazed.

The twins' jaws dropped. "You're a prankster?"

Lupin only nodded, enjoying the dazed and blue Dumbledore.

* * *

MINIFIC 4 (with Sailor Moon)

"Is it love again?" said Voldemort, his snake's face jeering. "Dumbledore favorite solution, love, which he claimed conquered death, though love did not stop him falling from the tower and breaking like and old waxwork? Love, which did not prevent me stamping out your Mudblood mother like a cockroach, Potter - and nobody seems to love you enough to run forward this time and take my curse. So what will stop you dying now when I strike?"

"SPIRAL MOON HEART ATTACK!"

Before anyone could react, a gigantic burst of pink light smashed into Voldemort.

"Lovely~!"

As his remains fell to the ground, he transformed into the shed skin of a snake. While the majority of the wizards and witches stood there dumbfounded, Harry just smirked.

"The Power of Love, when wielded by a sufficiently angry Magical Girl, is as strong as a tactical nuclear missile. Ponder that in the next life, Riddle."


	2. Polyjuice, Marriage 2, Chocolate

MINIFIC 5 (with Hime-chan's Ribbon)

Himeko was shaking her head. "So, how is this potion useful for us?" asked the blond sixth-year crossly. She had been told by Harry, Ron, and Hermione that it was the only way to get into the Slytherin common room. "I can-" she started, but then stopped herself. "I can ask Daichi to look into it; you know he's in Slytherin."

Ron shook his head. "He's a Slytherin, we can't trust him with the Heir being on the loose."

Himeko had to focus on not smacking Ron upside the head. "He's my boyfriend, I trust him."

Harry, Ron, and Hermione all exchanged a look. "In any case, we will need your help in getting the ingredients. We can get everything except Boomslang Skin and Bicorn Horn Powder, and those we'll probably need to steal from-"

"I'm NOT stealing anything!"

But Daichi had just come around a corner. "Who needs to steal from who?"

"These three think they need to steal Boomslang Skin and Bicorn Horn Powder from Snape."

"Really?" Daichi looked from Himeko to the Trio and back. "And you can't help why?"

"For three reasons. One, that thing we discussed back in second year. Two, it's stealing. Three, I was planning on asking you to help find out what they need instead."

Daichi laughed. "I see, I see... so, how can I be of assistance?"

Harry took Daichi aside and started to explain...

* * *

MINIFIC 6

Ginny was beside herself with rage. The twins were smirking; they knew that Mum was messing with Ginny at this point (given she was dating Harry Potter, and her arranged marriage was with Harry Potter). Arthur Weasley, wisely, was weeding with wonder in the wildberry patch (as he didn't think he'd be able to keep his mouth shut long enough).

"I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU ARRANGED MY MARRIAGE!"

"Ginny, calm down-"

"I WILL NOT CALM DOWN! I JUST FOUND OUT THAT I HAVE NO SAY IN WHO I MARRY!"

"Ginny, if you'd just listen for a second-"

"I HAVE HALF A MIND TO JUST ELOPE WITH HARRY!"

"But Ginny, Harry's-"

"HE'S WHAT? HE'S NOT SOME RICH PUREBLOOD PRAT, I CAN ASSURE YOU!"

"Harry's the-"

"SO WHAT IF HARRY'S THE CHOSEN ONE? SO WHAT IF IT MEANS HE MIGHT DIE FIGHTING VOLDEMORT?" But Ginny's temper was defusing as she finished that thought. The thought of losing Harry for good sobered her. "He's the one I want to be with. Not the legendary hero that rescued me from Tom Riddle, but the noble prat that wants to help everyone..."

Molly held her daughter close. "Ginny, it's a very good thing you love Harry, as he's your fiance. I didn't mean to make you angry like that, but we all thought it was funny that you were dating the person we were going to make you marry anyway."

"You still weren't going to let me choose?" Ginny asked thickly.

"We would have nullified it if you didn't want him. All those years of being his fangirl, though... I don't think they helped any."

Ginny chuckled weakly, then leaned into her mother. "Does Harry know?"

At the mention of his name, Harry flooed in alongside Professor Dumbledore. "Does Harry know what?" he asked.

* * *

MINIFIC 7

There was a bar of muggle chocolate on the desk. Beside it was a note that said "Thanks for everything - F&G"

Argus Filch looked at it warily. He remembered the first time he'd gotten candy from the twins, shortly after the first time he'd ranted at them in his office. They had gotten in trouble for going into the Forbidden Forest and caught by Hagrid. When he'd tried to scare them with tales of disembowelment, one of them had the nerve to set off a dungbomb n his office! They'd had detention for a week with Minerva for that one, they had. The chocolate he'd gotten from that one was a Honeydukes specialty. He knew he should have gone to the Headmaster with evidence that there was a student or two sneaking out to Hogsmeade, but decided that the chocolate was not to go to waste.

Argus Filch eyed it hungrily. The next time he'd gotten chocolate from the twins was a year ago, after Mrs. Norris had gotten petrified. That time around, it was a chocolate bunny that leapt around his office. After the first day, it was reasonably well-behaved. He smiled at the memory; with all the trouble they'd caused Lockhart that year, the bribe was pretty much worth it. After Mrs. Norris was unpetrified, the bunny stopped moving, and the man and cat shared a chocolatey celebratory dessert that year.

Argus Filch unwrapped it nervously. Why would the twins be thanking him with a muggle chocolate bar? The last time someone had given him something like this, it had been James Potter telling him to hold on to the Marauder's Map (James had told him exactly what it was and how to use it) until the next set of big pranksters came along...

Then it clicked. Of course! He chuckled at how obvious it had been.

"I wondered why," he said to Mrs. Norris, "this place is a little too quiet today. Shall we check on Mister Potter, my sweet?"

He smiled fondly at the thought of his two favorite pranksters, understanding why they were thanking him two years too early...


End file.
